Healthy communication

 This week we have been focused on the role that communication plays in the different relationships that we form and the different types of communication between the people we interact with in our day to day life. When we are communicating with each other there are three general forms that they take verbally: the words we speak. Tone the feeling that we inject into the words that we speak and non-verbal or body language how what we do with our body speaks to others. When discussing each of them how much is conveyed from each only fourteen percent was conveyed through verbal communication followed by thirty five from tone and fifty one from non-verbal communication. To me this speaks of both the complexity of communication but how often we misunderstand or miss vital information because we are so focused on the verbal aspects and often only halfway listening to the tonal part while completely ignoring everything else. Using that view most of the time we are missing two thirds or more of the information and yet act surprised we aren’t understood or why can’t seem to fully understand what others are trying to teach or tell us. From this we see that as we see the different forms of communication we become more sensitive and avoid assuming we know what others are thinking and truly seek to understand what they are saying.

After we have learned to understand the different aspects of communication we seek to understand the best ways to diffuse conflict. From five effective methods of communication we can seek to resolve the differences peacefully. Number five is is what is referred as stroking which means to complement others for something good about them in a respectful manner and that which you authentically believe which makes sense because for one of the things we want most from other is authenticity because we want people we can trust and those that are authentic and tell the truth and much easier to trust. Fourth is to assert by using “I feel” statements when she are interact with our more intimate relationships. By using I feel statements not only are you being vulnerable and open but we also are telling them exactly what we are feel meaning no one is guessing what you feel you are tell you exactly what you feel both strengthened our connection and understanding each other. Third is to inquire and then confirm what others are feeling and thinking one of the ways we can do this is through parroting which is to repeat back what they say to confirm we heard and understand them properly. Second both thought and feeling empathy. We share both our empathetic thoughts but also empathy that we feel towards them. Lastly, the first or number one is what is called the disarming technique in which you look for the truth in whatever someone tells you even if it is only a kernel and even if it isn’t what you want to hear, accepting truth regardless of how we feel. From these we can seek not only to better understand one another but emphasize with one another and find the truth that each of us is speaking so that regardless of how we feel we can come to understand and believe in one another.

Lastly as we are seeking to counsel each other the best way that we can do we seek not to limit ourselves to compromise for all its pros it’s cons are just as strong. We should seek to reach a consensus from each of our viewpoints and learn from each of our views to reach the best possible outcome that we both agree on.